Resignation

by Berck

July is almost gone, I’m still “two weeks” from being finished.

I showed up for my 2pm flight with Ed a little before 2pm. One of the designated examiner’s in the area had just completed a CFI check ride for two students. I checked the weather. A little cloudy with a cold front that was supposed to come through at 5pm, possibly bringing thunderstorms with it. Ed was finally ready to fly at about 3pm after sitting through the debriefing of his two students.

We spent an hour in the pattern, working on my power off accuracy landings. I think I’m a bit better at it now. We did 8-10 of them and I only missed 2, I think. Unfortunately, it felt more like dumb luck than really knowing what I’m doing. It’s a very hard thing to judge. You can pitch up for slower airspeed and drop quicker faster, pitch over and gain some airspeed and extend your glide… You can turn in closer to the runway or further out, and drop flaps. But you can’t retract flaps after you put them down. Each of these corrections have a bit of finality about them, because you’re always getting lower and closer. Everything I change takes what seems like forever to create an observable effect, by which time the tendency is to put in even more correction resulting in over-correction.

Ed said he thought I looked frustrated. In truth, I feel more apathetic than anything. I feel like I haven’t got any control over my situation. I’ve tried so hard to finish as quickly as possible, and the harder I try, the longer it takes. One of the 172-RG’s has been down since the day of my checkride, and the other one only has about 10 hours left before its 100-hour inspection. I get the feeling I’m going to be signed off and have to sit around for an inspection.

My foot has sores on it, so I sent a picture to Dad. He thinks I have fungi.

I’m tired of the summer. I want to live where it’s winter all the time.

It took me a long time to go through the mail today. I don’t know why, but checking the mail is one of my favourite parts of the day. Considering that all I ever get is junk mail and bills, I’m not sure why. I always hope there’s something exciting in the mail, but when there is, it’s usually not exciting for very long.

I went outside to water the plants, which I hope will make it rain.

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