{"id":1101,"date":"2008-02-13T20:02:21","date_gmt":"2008-02-14T03:02:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nachzen.net\/?p=1101"},"modified":"2008-02-13T20:02:21","modified_gmt":"2008-02-14T03:02:21","slug":"happy-birthday-elliott","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/?p=1101","title":{"rendered":"Happy Birthday Elliott"},"content":{"rendered":"

My younger nephew Elliott turned 2 yesterday. I know this because I checked my calendar on Sunday to make sure I was doing what I was supposed to be doing about birth control and noticed that his birthday was two days later. So he’ll be getting his birthday present a little late.<\/p>\n

But I called him yesterday to wish him a happy birthday. When you’re a 2 year old boy, conversation consists mostly of sound effects. Our discussion went something like this:<\/p>\n

Stephanie in the background: “Say hi to Aunt Joanna?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: “Hi!”<\/p>\n

Me: “Hi, Elliott! Happy birthday!”<\/p>\n

Elliott: [Very excited] “Yahyah! Zhoom, smssh”<\/p>\n

Me: “Do you have a cake with airplanes on it?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: “Cake! Jsheeew, jsheew!”<\/p>\n

Me: “Did you go to the zoo today?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: “Yahyah! Rrrragh!”<\/p>\n

Stephanie in the background: “Did you see tigers?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: [Roaring] “RRRRAGH!”<\/p>\n

Stephanie in the background: “…and a walrus?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: [Slight pause] “RRAGH KAH!”<\/p>\n

Stephanie in the background: “…and wolves?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: “RRRAGH!”<\/p>\n

Stephanie in the background: “What do wolves say?”<\/p>\n

Elliott: [Pause and then a very high pitched] “Ooooooooo!”<\/p>\n

We “talked” quite a bit more, but sound effects and cell phone static get mixed in together.<\/p>\n

\"Elliott<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My younger nephew Elliott turned 2 yesterday. I know this because I checked my calendar on Sunday to make sure I was doing what I was supposed to be doing about birth control and noticed that his birthday was two days later. So he’ll be getting his birthday present a little late. But I called…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1101","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nonclassified-nonsense"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1101","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1101"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1101\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1101"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1101"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1101"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}