{"id":397,"date":"1996-02-25T17:03:25","date_gmt":"1996-02-25T23:03:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nachzen.net:8080\/?p=397"},"modified":"1996-02-25T17:03:25","modified_gmt":"1996-02-25T23:03:25","slug":"i-hate-morning-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/?p=397","title":{"rendered":"I hate morning people."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I stayed up late again last night talking to people on the Internet.  I guess<br \/>\nI finally gave up and went to bed around 3:30 a.m.<\/p>\n<p>My mom walked into my room a few hours later, saying, &#8220;Wake up!  It&#8217;s<br \/>\nmorning!  I have something for you.&#8221;  I pulled the covers away from my eyes.<br \/>\n Not that it helped much.  I&#8217;m virtually blind without my glasses, and I<br \/>\ndon&#8217;t wear them to bed.  &#8220;Huh?&#8221; I groaned and squinted in what might have<br \/>\nbeen her direction.  &#8220;I have something for you!&#8221; she repeated, shoving<br \/>\nsomething in my face.  Good thing too.  I never would have been able to<br \/>\nsuccessfully focus on it otherwise.  In her hand and in front of my nose was<br \/>\na coffee mug.  Inside the mug were three green army figures frozen in<br \/>\nassorted postures of combat.  I peered steadily at the mug, the toys, my<br \/>\nmother&#8217;s hand, as she started singing, &#8220;The best part of waking up is<br \/>\nsoldiers in your cup&#8230;&#8221;  I rolled over and flipped the covers back over my<br \/>\nhead as mom laughed and left the room.<\/p>\n<p>I guess that&#8217;s what I get for throwing a bag of lettuce at my dad last night<br \/>\nand commenting, &#8220;That&#8217;s tossed salad.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I stayed up late again last night talking to people on the Internet. I guess I finally gave up and went to bed around 3:30 a.m. My mom walked into my room a few hours later, saying, &#8220;Wake up! It&#8217;s morning! I have something for you.&#8221; I pulled the covers away from my eyes. Not&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-397","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nonclassified-nonsense"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/397","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=397"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/397\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=397"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=397"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=397"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}