I seem to have a rather fatalistic outlook on life, or at least
\nrelationships. I’ve seen so many friendships fall by the wayside. I never
\nmeant for it to happen, it just does. “Letters that you never meant to send,
\nlost or thrown away.” Except that I’ve written letters to people and meant
\nto send them, but never finished them, never stuck them in envelopes, never
\naffixed postage… Perhaps this has affected my outlook on my relationship
\nto people. When I meet someone, I tend to forget their name right off.
\n Maybe it’s because I never intend on seeing them again. Maybe because
\nprecedence has proved that in general that’s what happens.<\/p>\n
I’m wondering who that woman is who was in the bathroom with all the girls
\nwith St. Paul’s nametags at school last week. I know I’ve seen her before.
\n Or if not her, someone very much like her. I’m sure I had a conversation
\nwith her. She has kids. Maybe she homeschooled or used to. I can even tell
\nyou what her personality is like. At least, I’m pretty sure I can. But I
\ncan’t remember where I saw her. And there’s no way I’m going to recall her
\nname.<\/p>\n
My family all seems to suffer from phone ring timing disorder. A bunch of
\npeople are downstairs. I can hear them addressing one another. The phone
\njust started ringing. It rang. It rang again. And again. No one was
\npicking it up. So finally I picked up the one on my desk that’s virtually
\nattached to the modem. I turn the ringer off because I hate having a phone
\nring in my room. I can usually hear it from downstairs or in Steph’s room.
\n My parents’ room is directly under mine, so I can usually hear it through
\nthe floor. And if I can’t, that’s okay. That means I don’t have to worry
\nabout answering it. Considering that it’s never for me. About the only time
\nI touch it is to pick it up to see if anyone is on the line or not so I can
\nget on the modem.<\/p>\n
But the phone was ringing, and no one was picking it up. So I did. I waited
\na second to make sure no one had gotten the same idea downstairs. Then I
\nsaid quietly into the receiver, “Hello?” “Yes,” came the calm voice at the
\nother end of the line, “May I speak to…” At that moment the speaker phone
\ndownstairs came on and my mom yelled, “HELLO?!” There was that moment of
\nconfusion when three people are trying to communicate at once and aren’t
\nreally sure who the other is. I just kept quiet while the lady on the other
\nend repeated her request, this time able to complete it by asking for
\nStephanie. Mom yelled something back, but I hung up. My services were no
\nlonger needed.<\/p>\n
We all tend to yell into the speaker phone. That’s because if we talk
\nnormally, it doesn’t seem to catch our voices.<\/p>\n
Nathan and I were having a discussion about nudism. I said that I didn’t
\nthink I’d have much a problem with it. It’s just not a big deal for me to
\nsee naked people, and I don’t think it’d be real embarassing for me to go
\naround without any clothes on. Anyway, now everyone is in the discussion.
\n The guys seem to think it’d be a really bad idea, while people like my mom
\nand me aren’t ready to condemn nudist colonies. I mean, it doesn’t embarrass
\nme to see someone without clothes on. And the only reason I’d be
\nuncomfortable naked is if the people around me are feeling that way. But I
\ncan say this and not know how I’d really react until it actually happened.
\n Which, chances are, it won’t. I don’t know why I’m telling you this.<\/p>\n
Nathan said he could make a killing selling nude pictures of me. He said
\nnext time he sees Stephen he’s gonna ask him how much he’d pay for nude
\npictures of me. We made predictions about what his reaction would be. Ah,
\nwhat we do to amuse ourselves.<\/p>\n
It’s been an interesting weekend. Denise, Nathan, and I have done some
\nhanging, since Steph’s been off babysitting each night. They all just went
\ndown to Cream ‘n Bean for coffee. Asked me if I wanted to go. I declined.
\n I’m supposedly writing an English paper.<\/p>\n
I need to start a new chess game. That’s what I need to do. I’m having
\ntrouble finding a reason for living. A chess game should do that for me.<\/p>\n
My brother just gently berated me for keeping the popcorn popper up in my
\nroom. He’s probably been looking for it for 10 minutes now. Ah well. I
\nshould have appologized.<\/p>\n
Did you know that Newt Gingrich fell in love with his high school teacher,
\nand they got married? She got cancer later on. He grew up, changed, and
\ndivorced her.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I seem to have a rather fatalistic outlook on life, or at least relationships. I’ve seen so many friendships fall by the wayside. I never meant for it to happen, it just does. “Letters that you never meant to send, lost or thrown away.” Except that I’ve written letters to people and meant to send…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-403","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nonclassified-nonsense"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/403","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=403"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/403\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=403"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=403"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=403"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}