{"id":70,"date":"2004-04-09T14:47:00","date_gmt":"2004-04-09T20:47:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nachzen.net:8080\/?p=70"},"modified":"2004-12-01T21:10:31","modified_gmt":"2004-12-02T03:10:31","slug":"jillions-of-gerbils","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/?p=70","title":{"rendered":"Jillions of gerbils"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Berck and I are now the proud &#8220;parents&#8221; of a new gerbil.  It happened like this&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I was heading out the door to a job interview when I noticed a black and white cat crouched by the tire of the car parked next to the Miata.  I recognized the cat; I often see him roaming the parking lots of our apartment complex.  In fact, one evening when we had our door wide open to let the evening breeze in, I looked up to the see the cat all the way through the doorway, poking his nose around to see who was inside&#8230;though he dashed off when I stood up and greeted him with, &#8220;Hi, cat!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>But now as approached our car, the cat completely ignored me.  He was intently staring at something emerging from behind the other side of the tire.  A gerbil!  I froze and thought to myself, I am about to witness a death.  The thought of rescuing the gerbil occurred to me, but only briefly.  Rodents are cheap and don&#8217;t live long, and this one&#8217;s owner had most likely already given it up for lost or dead.  Still, I felt obligated to watch its death, not that I wanted to; it just seemed the proper respect to pay an animal I was declining to rescue.<\/p>\n<p>But the cat didn&#8217;t pounce.  And the gerbil didn&#8217;t try to run away.  It simply walked to the other side of the tire, while the cat passed to the opposite side.  I amused myself with the cartoonish idea that these two natural enemies were actually friends, out playing in the parking lot.  I had to leave, and the two animals were continuing their protracted chase further under the car.  So I came inside and informed Berck about my surreal encounter.  He was standing, blinking, in the bathroom in his boxers, having just awoken. <\/p>\n<p>When I returned from the job interview (for which I was hired on the spot, although it&#8217;s just a warehouse job that pays $8 an hour), I found Berck again in the bathroom, this time fully clothed.  &#8220;Well, did you see your friend?&#8221; he asked.  In a plastic storage tub by the front door was a little box and a towel with tell-tale rodent droppings on it.  Out of the box poked a quivering, whisker covered,  orange and white nose.  &#8220;I glanced out the window and saw the cat playing with him,&#8221; Berck admitted.  &#8220;The cat was poking, trying to make him run.  I couldn&#8217;t let him toy with him until he killed him!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I made somewhat of an effort to find the gerbil&#8217;s owner (he can&#8217;t have gone far&#8230;he certainly didn&#8217;t walk all the way from Mongolia, where gerbils originated).  I went next door to the kleptomaniac kid&#8217;s house to ask first.  Dad bought us some pepper plants at Wal-Mart when he was here helping us get settled the day after we arrived.  We hadn&#8217;t gotten around to planting them yet, and they were still sitting in their little containers on the front porch.  One afternoon there was a knock at the door, and I opened it to see a little kid with thick black hair and very crooked teeth standing there holding one of the peppers.  Behind him, standing back on the sidewalk, a woman my age stood with her arms crossed and a very stern expression on her face.<\/p>\n<p>The little boy took a deep breath, held out the pepper, stared at the ground, and said in a continuous stream, &#8220;I&#8217;m very sorry I saw this plant and I took it I don&#8217;t know why just for the heck of it I didn&#8217;t know it was just sitting out in the sun and I&#8217;m very sorry&#8230;&#8221;  Here he offered the plant to me.  I took it, trying not to laugh out loud, and thanked him.  His mother&#8217;s expression melted into a smile, and they walked back to their apartment together.<\/p>\n<p>The next day there was another knock, this time the boy&#8217;s mother asking to borrow a Phillip&#8217;s screwdriver to take her vacuum apart.  I figured she meant it when she promised to bring it right back.<\/p>\n<p>So she seemed the logical person to ask first about a missing gerbil.  It&#8217;s a rather odd thing to knock on someone&#8217;s door and ask, &#8220;Have you lost a gerbil?&#8221;  She hadn&#8217;t.  I asked if she&#8217;d like a gerbil if I couldn&#8217;t find the owner.  &#8220;Yes!&#8221; she said.  I&#8217;m not sure which would be worse for the gerbil&#8217;s health: the black and white cat or her two boys.  But gerbils are cheap and don&#8217;t live long anyway.<\/p>\n<p>Next I asked a lady playing with her miniature daschunds  in the grass across the street, but she didn&#8217;t have a gerbil either.  I spotted a couple of Oriental kids playing in the parking lot, so I called to them, &#8220;Did you guys lose a gerbil!&#8221;  They screeched to a halt and nodded.  So I went inside and collected the gerbil&#8217;s box\/nest.  It&#8217;s a convenient way to pick him up, instead of chasing him around the tub with one&#8217;s hand.  But when I went back outside, the kids were nowhere to be seen.  I heard them, however, giggling and crouched behind an apartment&#8217;s porch fence.  &#8220;Is this your gerbil?&#8221; I asked them.  They giggled at me and peered into the box, jumping back in surprise to see a living creature inside.  They giggled some more and moved closer to get a better look.  I was getting the feeling they didn&#8217;t speak much English.  &#8220;Is this your apartment?&#8221;  Giggles.  &#8220;What&#8217;s his name?&#8221; I asked, pointing to the gerbil. <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Minda!&#8221; said the little girl, poking herself in the chest.  Oh, dear.  About that time an Oriental man strolled around the corner.  I asked him if the gerbil was his.  He looked inside the box with much the same reaction as his kids had, except without the giggling. <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No,&#8221; he said.  He ordered the kids to come with him in a guttural language.  I wondered what he thought about the strange woman in the parking lot, pushing rodents to susceptible children.  (&#8220;Wanna see my gerbil?&#8221;)<\/p>\n<p>I asked a couple of other people in the parking lot, but by the time everyone began arriving home from work, I gave up.  I didn&#8217;t expect many nine-to-fivers to keep gerbils as pets.<\/p>\n<p>We fed the gerbil a crust of bread, which he held in his hands and chewed furiously for a few minutes.  Berck held him and played with him for quite a while.  &#8220;Do you want to keep him?&#8221; he asked.  I don&#8217;t care.  &#8220;Do you wanna keep him?&#8221; a few minutes later.  No.  &#8220;But you said you didn&#8217;t care!&#8221;  I was getting the idea Berck wanted to keep him.  He had found the gerbil FAQ and read it while I was away.  &#8220;He needs gerbil food and wood shavings,&#8221; Berck informed me.  &#8220;But I think he&#8217;s a she.  Males are supposed to have two little bumps by their tails.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>So we took an evening trip to Petsmart.  While we were there, we bought another betta.  (It&#8217;s Berck&#8217;s gamma betta, my alpha betta.)  So now we have two pets, though neither of them have names yet.  I&#8217;m reluctant to name the gerbil; his&#8230;er, her owner could still turn up.  But mom is mailing my late mouse Stalin&#8217;s cage to us.  In the meantime, the gerbil seems quite happy to live in a plastic tub filled with wood shavings, though she tries from time to time to dig through the plastic, making a noise like a CD skipping.<\/p>\n<p>I wonder if the black and white cat is out there searching for his friend&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Berck and I are now the proud &#8220;parents&#8221; of a new gerbil. It happened like this&#8230; I was heading out the door to a job interview when I noticed a black and white cat crouched by the tire of the car parked next to the Miata. I recognized the cat; I often see him roaming&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-70","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nonclassified-nonsense"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/70","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=70"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/70\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=70"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=70"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/nachzen.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=70"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}