There’s a Chinese strip mall just across the street from my hotel. I ate dinner at the Golden Buddha, since a Chinese restaurant with the same name in Douglasville is my favorite Chinese place of all time. This place wasn’t as good, though pretty expensive and not bad.

I only ate half of my General Tso’s and got the rest in a box to take home, even though there’s no refrigerator. Probably still be okay for lunch tomorrow.

When I left, I roamed around the rest of the area and was astonished to find a grocery store. I walked in, and realized immediately that while it was a grocery store, it was a CHINESE grocery store. I felt like I’d fallen in a trap door and wound up on the other side of the world.

Not you’re average little Asian market, oh no. This place is the size of a large grocery store, and has all of the bits of a grocery store you’d expect. The meat section, the seafood section, the beverage section, the rice aisle, the soy sauce aisle, the bean curd aisle. Lots of jars without any engrish on them at all, and ones with just enough english to be scary. “sliced cooked dried fried pork product.” Really.

I wasn’t going to buy anything, but I saw a bottle labeled “Dumpling Sauce”. I’ve often asked waiters what the heck the sauce they bring with dumplings is, and they always answer, “It is dumpling sauce.” Up until now, that’s seemed less than helpful. So I bought a bottle. Then I saw a bottle labeled “Shanghai Worcestershire Sauce (No Fermented Flavoring)” and, how could you pass that up? I also bought some hot peppered beef jerky, and then saw the alcohol aisle.

So I bought a random bottle imported from china. About $7 for .75 L. Should have been a tip-off there.

I got back to the hotel and poured a little of the bottle into a glass and drank a sip. Alcoholy, and ugh, oh, nasty! Nasty! Ahhh! I took a second sip to make sure, and yup, that’s nasty, but only the aftertaste. While it’s still in your mouth, it only tastes like drinking fire, and isn’t too unpleasant. Then you swallow it, and you feel like some unidentified reptile vomitted in your mouth. I even tried a third sip a little while later thinking, “I bought a whole bottle, can I drink it?” And uh, no. I can’t. I can however, get a headache from just a few measly sips. Nasty, nasty.

After trying to figure out what this stuff is on the web, I still have no idea.

The sum total of English on the bottle, which I didn’t read too closely beforehand:

RED STAR ER GUO TOU JIU
DISTILLED SPIRIT FROM SORGHUM 750ML. ALC.56% BY VOL
PRODUCED BY THE PEOPLE’S REPUBLIC OF CHINA
ISO9001

With the Chinese reputation of late, it’s probably got something like gasoline, rat poison, or lead in it.