I bought a salmon today for less than $8. Yes, a whole salmon (minus head and guts).

Was it worth going to the Super Wal-Mart? I’m not sure.

You might get robbed, you might get shot
And that’s just in the Wal-Mart parking lot

As I pawed through the freezer, trying to find the smallest salmon I could (I was afraid it wouldn’t fit in our freezer), a little boy came up and tugged at my coat. “Excuse me, excuse me…”

I turned and gave him my attention. His dark brown hair was cut in a buzz, and his front teeth were crooked. Six? I’m afraid I’m not very good at judging ages. I used to be small. I just don’t remember how small I was.

“Look at those!” he exclaimed, hanging onto the edge of my coat with one hand and swinging the other toward the tank of lobsters behind us.

“I’m sorry,” said his mother, looking exasperated and apologetic, but not stopping her excavation at the other end of the freezer.

“Those are big crabs!” he continued.

“They’re LOBSTERS!” I replied, grinning.

“Yeah! And they’ll pinch you with their pinchers! Like this!” He reached forward and pinched the shirt at my tummy. “Pinch pinch pinch!”

“That’s why they put rubber bands on their hands!” I replied.

His mother laughed and called him away from me.

I selected a fish, stuck it under my arm, and went to look at frozen pizzas.

Actual Fact: The = sign was invented by the 16th Century Welsh mathematician Robert Recorde, who got tired of writing “is equal to” in his equations. He chose the two lines because “noe 2 thynges can be moare equalle.”