Southern Tour — Day 1, Disaster Strikes

After going to bed about ten last night, we got up at 3:30 am, showered, packed the car, and left in an hour. Memphis was 18 hours away, and we wanted to get there before midnight.

Looking for breakfast in Lamar about three hours later, we missed our turn to Kansas and instead found ourselves in Oklahoma. No problem, it wasn’t any further to go our new alternate route. (After traveling this route three times in a week a year ago, you would think that I would wonder why it didn’t seem familiar. That’s because we had taken that route on a “short cut” on our way back to Norman, OK that would have been fine except that the county road we took was horribly maintained.) The advantage of our new route was that the rising sun wasn’t in our eyes as we headed due south.

Following Street Atlas’ directions on a gravel road circumventing Boise City, Oklahoma, we turned east and joined US64. A few miles down the road, Berck yelled and immediately pulled off onto the shoulder. He had looked down to find the temperature gague all the way past H. As soon as we stopped, we could see the steam shooting out from under the hood. Berck opened the radiator cap (because he knows what he’s doing and isn’t going to hurt himself–kids, don’t try this at home) and poured what remained of our two bottles of drinking water inside. The steam, which had stopped, started up again. Apparently, he had noticed we were out of coolant right as we went bone dry. It was also pretty darn cold, so we may have been riding in an air-cooled car for a while. Either way, it looked like we had avoided seizing the engine by a hair.

Lucky as we are, we were still stranded on the side of the road in the middle of The Panhandle (read, the Middle of Nowhere). Berck’s new phone doesn’t have analog capability, but fortunately, my phone still does. I called AAA, not really sure if my mom had renewed my membership for this year. Nope, my membership had expired in April, but they were kind enough to MapQuest the nearest wrecker service… which was 50 miles away.

We figured we could do better with Street Atlas, and sure enough, Berck found the number for a wrecker and repair service in the town we had just bypassed. I called the number, and a woman answered the phone, “Hello?”

I was worried I had a wrong number. “Are you open?”

“No,” she replied. You might think I would be dismayed at this answer, but I was actually elated that I seemed to have the right business. I launched into an explanation of our coolent leak, where we were, and that we needed to be picked up. “Hold on,” she said, then in the background, “Mike, there’s a lady stranded.”

I told Mike where we were (I knew exactly, thanks to Street Atlas–I could have even given him coordinates), and he said he would come pick us up but added, “It’ll be hard finding a place open to fix your car on a Saturday.”

Then we waited for the tow truck to come. There were very few cars on that road on a Saturday morning. Since we were in Oklahoma, I knew it would only be a matter of time before someone stopped to help, but only about five cars passed us in the twenty minutes or so it took the wrecker to show. Sure enough, a middle aged man in a suit stopped right before the wrecker pulled up.

Mike pulled the car onto his flatbed with one hand on his cell phone, trying to get in touch with a mechanic who would work on Saturday. He found a fellow towing company in Guymon, the nearest “big” town away, who said they would. Unfortunately, Guymon was fifty miles away. It was that or try to find a place in Boise City until Monday.

$256 and a very bumpy ride later, a fellow in Guymon was trying to find our coolant leak. Berck thought it might be a plug in the back of the engine, but it turned out it was a hose at the back and bottom of the engine that doesn’t exist in the ’91 Miata but does in the ’94. Berck had checked all of the other hoses in the car to see if they needed replacing when we first got the car but not the ones he didn’t know about.

A couple hours and $110 later, we had a new hose and a coolant system that didn’t empty itself immediately anymore. We stopped at Yesterday’s Diner that was serving excellent black Angus bugers and finally got our breakfast. It was around 2 o’clock.

So much for getting to Memphis in a day’s drive, and so much for getting up at 3:30 am. We decided to stop in Enid for the night.

At a gas station in Woodward, the temperature gague suddenly rose again as we pulled up to the pumps. Berck spent the next 45 minutes putting water into the radiator and revving the engine. When we got to Enid, the radiator was low again. This is bad news. It means that the head gasket is busted or we’ve got a cracked or warped head and coolant is leaking into the engine. Berck can replace a head gasket himself, but he’s not so sure what to do when he doesn’t know exactly what the problem is. The good news is that we can probably keep driving if we keep the coolant level high.

The other good news is that we are settled into a motel room in Enid for the night. The great thing about Street Atlas is that it will not only tell you how to get to Enid, it will also tell you where all of the hotels are, along with their phone numbers. So I called through the whole list (it being Saturday and mobile phone calls free) and got rates. We decided to check out the cheapest one first, $35 pre tax.

It looked decent. I opened the door of the office and was overwhelmed with the scent of curry. Uh oh. My dad swore never to stay in a place run by east Indians or Pakistanis
after my family had a bad experience once. But the place looked neat and clean, and we really couldn’t beat the price. Berck walked in after parking the car and said, “Something smells good!”

The young man who had hurried into the office from the back room (in which I could see squealing kids playing on the floor and grandparents looking after them), wiped his hands on his pants and said, “Yeah! We just finished eating enchiladas.”

Berck and I looked at each other after we walked out of the office, “Curry enchiladas?”

The room turns out to be just about our speed: dated furniture, well worn carpet, a slightly cracked bathroom mirror, but neat and clean, although Berck swears he saw a roach in the sink. We even have a microwave and a fridge.

Berck was worried about the temperature dropping tonight and the car not having enough antifreeze in it, so I found the nearest auto parts store with Street Atlas. When we got back to the motel, I found the Weather Channel on the TV and discovered that the forecasted low tonight was only going to be 36 degrees. That made Berck happier, but so did putting more antifreeze in the car. Actually, he’s not very happy right now at all, too worried about the car.

Now we’re going to go out and try to find some dinner. Street Atlas has a whole list of most of the restaurants in the city, but unfortunately, it doesn’t say which ones are good. So I suppose we’ll have to go back to the method of driving around and looking.

Tomorrow: Memphis?

2006 Wish List – Updated

We each have Amazon wish lists, so check those out. You have to use “Brenner” to find mine.

For Joanna:

A lint shaver (like this one), preferably one I can plug in.

A nicely writing fountain pen with a fine point, one that’s easy to hold.

Sweaters (A cotton, x-large, black one would be great. I especially like cardigans.)

Airplane cross stitch patterns (or a computer program to make them)

Some BDU pants, size Large-Regular or inseam 29 1/2 to 32 in., waist 35 to 39. I prefer solid black or blue, but any color or design would be fine.

A Dutch oven

A Camelbak

SmartWool socks

Thick cotton boot socks

For Berck:

Yet more books

Berck also wants BDU pants, X-Large-Regular, inseam 29-32 1/2, waist 39 to 43, but they HAVE to be ripstop (you can tell because the fabricmakes little squares). He doesn’t particularly want camo colored. Solid colors are fine.

He could always use some more SmartWool socks.

For both:

Amazingly, our Amazon wedding registry is still active. As is the one at Cooking.com (Berck is especially keen about knives).

Actual Fact: Cardigan sweaters are named after James Thomas Brudenell, 7th Earl of Cardigan, whose other claim to fame was leading the Charge of the Light Brigade in the Crimean War.

So, about Thanksgiving…

I think Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. Maybe because it has to do with one of my favorite topics. That being, of course, food.

This year I got to have two Thanksgiving dinners. Max and Tamsey brought their kids out to visit their grandparents while Max went elk hunting, but they had to leave the Monday before. So we were invited to partake in a pre-Thanksgiving dinner at the Bremers’ house on Sunday.

My sister Stephanie and her family drove all the way out here too so her husband Nathan could go hunting with Max. They were successful and got two impressive bulls. In the meantime, I got to play with my nephews and Max’s kids. Here I am reading JB Bremer a story. There are two other random kids in the picture too, because, well, there’s always kids around.

Stephanie and Nathan got here November 9th, and I just took Berck’s mom to the airport this morning. Three weeks of company! It was so much fun, but it’s also very nice to be back to normal around here.

I’m eating a slice of coconut cream pie after heating up a plate of Thanksgiving dinner. Berck can’t eat because his jaw is hurting. Fortunately for him, his mom put the turkey carcass in a pot to boil on Thursday evening (it’s been simmering every since; I have a big pot) and made soup out of it yesterday. He’s been living off of broth, V8, and beer.

So, back to the feasts. I think I’ll discuss them by dish.

Butternut Squash Soup. Throughout the last year, I kept hearing references to butternut squash soup served at Thanksgiving. I don’t know if it’s a fad or if the Pilgrims actually pureed their bounty. I’d never had the stuff, so I thought I’d try a recipe that looked good. Stephanie and I collaborated on it for the pre-Thanksgiving meal, just in case it wasn’t any good. We needn’t have worried. It was delicious. I made it again for the real Thanksgiving and it was even better. I don’t know if it was organic squash from Whole Foods, the fact that I roasted it for an extra, extra, extra long time, or sauteing the onions in bacon grease, but the second batch was amazing. I didn’t have any sherry, so I used mead.

Cranberry Sauce. I don’t like cranberry sauce, and neither did all but one of our Thanksgiving Day feasters, but that didn’t stop me from making some anyway. It all started when I was watching the Osborne Christmas Special, and Jimmy Kimble’s partner from The Man Show (whose name escapes me) was teaching Jack how to make cranberry sauce. He said how much of a shame it was that everyone used the stuff in the can and nobody made cranberry sauce when it was so easy. Sure enough it was. I used the recipe from the Joy of Cooking:

1 lb fresh cranberries, picked over
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup water
1/2 cup orange juice

Boil all of the ingredients for about 10 minutes (at 6,000 feet), chill, and serve.

It was quite tasty, actually, even if I still don’t like cranberry sauce. I found that was really good along with

Sweet Potato Casserole. This dish is Stephanie’s specialty, and if there isn’t any served, it means she didn’t come to dinner. She made a batch for both dinners. Cyrus, Michele’s nephew, who grew up in Vermont, stated, “The squash dish with almonds is very tasty.” Yankees don’t know a thing about Southern cooking.

Mashed Potatoes. I didn’t know this was a required Thanksgiving dish until Berck and I celebrated our first Thanksgiving as a married couple with my family in Highlands, NC. We were passing platters around when, after reviewing all of the dishes, Berck suddenly realized something and blurted out, “Where are the mashed potatoes? What’s wrong with you people?!” I have to say that mashed potatoes are a nice addition (as long as someone else makes them).

Sauerkraut. The other thing Berck noticed on that particular table is that we were all passing around a bowl of cold sauerkraut and putting some on our plates. At some point in my life, I realized that mine was the only family that I knew that served sauerkraut at Thanksgiving, and yet it had always been there, along with the turkey and stuffing. See, my mom’s mother’s parents both emigrated from Germany, and… well, that’s all I know.

Stuffing/Dressing. My mom never stuffed her turkeys, but she makes the best dressing anyway. She always said that it was stuffing if you stuffed it, dressing if you just made it on the side. I now know that it was always called stuffing until the Victorian era, when that word was suddenly considered far too descriptive. That’s about the time English speakers started referring to legs as “dark meat” and breasts as “white meat.” Using body parts simply brought too much to mind.

Anyway, Stephanie and I tried to make some dressing for the pre-Thanksgiving feast, but the oven became unexpectedly overcrowded, and it didn’t turn out quite right. Berck tried his hand yet again at making his own stuffing for his bird–I even baked him some cornbread–but it ended up being rather bacon greasy.

Pea Casserole. I guess green bean casserole is a mainstay of Thanksgiving dinners, although I don’t think my family ever had it (French’s fried onions are just pure calories and cholesterol with no nutritional value). I have a soft spot in my heart for the stuff after I attempted making it overseas one ex-pat November. The canned mushroom soup came either from the one store at the edge of town that had it (and was an hour bus ride away) or from a precious stash of imports. Fried onions were nowhere to be found. Anyway, pea casserole is all that green bean casserole is, except better.

Refrigerator Rolls. Oddly, this dish is a tradition for both of our families. This batch got baked a little long with everything happening at once at the end (and Berck dropping a casserole of stuffing on them). Still, they’re the best bread around.

Turkey. Our plan was to purchase an Empire Kosher Turkey, simply because we like Empire Kosher Chicken. But there were none to be had. The meat department guy at the King Soopers in Monument said he tried to get some in but they wouldn’t get them in time for Thanksgiving. So I got a fresh, natural Turkey from Whole Foods. I soaked it in brine the night before. Berck stuffed it, and we trussed it with a couple of drywall screws. Berck put it breast-side down in the roasting pan we bought last year to cook a turkey in. I got fussed at for putting it in an hour early, but either turkeys take longer to cook up here, or the Joy of Cooking was off an hour. I also got in trouble for putting it back in the oven with the LCD thermometer still in it. Good thing we had a spare thermometer after it melted. The bird was very tasty. I think it was the best turkey I’ve ever had. The breast (my part) was completely moist.

Gravy. Berck’s mom extracted the neck from the bird cavity, and Berck boiled it all day with onion and celery. Then he made a delicious gravy from the drippings and the broth. Yum.

Drinkies. For the pre-Thanksgiving dinner, I brought Woodchuck hard cider and Sam Adams Cherry Wheat beer, both of which were huge hits. (I also brought a six-pack of Fat Tire for Berck.) For Thanksgiving day, we had more cider, including some Strongbow, a bottle of Chateau Ste. Michelle Riesling (I now have two white wines I like), and most of a bottle of Est! Est!! Est!!!.

Desserts. For the pre-Thanksgiving dinner I accomplished the impossible: I made a pecan pie and a chocolate icebox pie that were both (yes, both!) saturated fat free. The crusts were made with skim milk and canola oil. Here’s my recipe:

Two pie crusts

Mix

2 cups flour
2 Tbs sugar
1/2 tsp salt

Make a well and pour in

1/4 milk
1/2 oil

(At 6,000 feet I need another couple tablespoons milk.)

Mix with a fork then roll out on wax paper. (Those little plastic cutting sheets work really well too.) Turn over on pie pans and shape.

The chocolate icebox pie was easy to fix. Just use fat-free sweetened condensed milk. (Although I did have to cook it a lot longer.) I was going to put light whipped cream on top, but the ubiquitous can in the Bremers’ fridge was gone, so Michele had to settle for some of the regular stuff.

But I know what you’re wondering is how you can make a pecan pie without any butter, aren’t you? Instead of a stick of butter, I substituted 1/4 cup canola oil, 1 Tbs milk, and 1/4 cup non-fat dry milk. And it worked! It tasted really good too.

But for Thanksgiving Day, I made both of them for real. I think Berck ate his chocolate ice box pie all by himself, though I do think his mom had a piece. There’s one more piece left, but he has to wait for his jaw to heal to eat anything.

I keep thinking I’m forgetting something. Maybe it was just the bag of Fritos Nathan opened as soon as he got to our house because dinner wasn’t ready yet.